Religion 2.0

How fun it is to worship
at the Church of Wholly Me!
Services are everyday
and, of course, admission's free!

I know what you're thinking
I used to think the same-
"All those wars and death and strife
isn't religion mostly to blame?"

With the old ways, yes it's true.
On this point we both agree.
But with the New, Improved, and Better Faith
I can't help but think of only Me!

Oh, sure, I know it's tough
to meet new folks, exchange a pleasantry.
But conversation is so easy
If the subject's always Me!

Oh, and that's too bad, about your woes.
Cancer is such a nasty thing
to have taken your husband long ago
and I see you still wear his ring.

But while we're on the subject,
did you know that I was ill?
For a while I was quite a sight
but I recovered, according to My will!

Now, about our funds, just so you know,
our budget isn't what it used to be,
which I find difficult to understand
because I always tithe to Me!

Evangelism is so easy,
the Faith's growing at quite a pace.
I don't know why, but thankfully
all the world holds Me in the proper place!

The mall's a tabernacle
T.V. ads are sacrosanct
Best part is, for all this stuff
I know it's Me I have to thank!

But anyway, you should drop by
next time you have an evening free.
Our membership's through the roof these days
at the Church of Wholly Me!