Religion 2.0

How fun it is to worship
at the Church of Wholly Me!
Services are everyday
and, of course, admission's free!

I know what you're thinking
I used to think the same-
"All those wars and death and strife
isn't religion mostly to blame?"

With the old ways, yes it's true.
On this point we both agree.
But with the New, Improved, and Better Faith
I can't help but think of only Me!

Oh, sure, I know it's tough
to meet new folks, exchange a pleasantry.
But conversation is so easy
If the subject's always Me!

Oh, and that's too bad, about your woes.
Cancer is such a nasty thing
to have taken your husband long ago
and I see you still wear his ring.

But while we're on the subject,
did you know that I was ill?
For a while I was quite a sight
but I recovered, according to My will!

Now, about our funds, just so you know,
our budget isn't what it used to be,
which I find difficult to understand
because I always tithe to Me!

Evangelism is so easy,
the Faith's growing at quite a pace.
I don't know why, but thankfully
all the world holds Me in the proper place!

The mall's a tabernacle
T.V. ads are sacrosanct
Best part is, for all this stuff
I know it's Me I have to thank!

But anyway, you should drop by
next time you have an evening free.
Our membership's through the roof these days
at the Church of Wholly Me!

Lady M

I got laid off on Friday. Residential land development has slowed down. The Market has spoken, and she told me my labor is spent better elsewhere. I gotta love a girl who'll just tell you how it is.

Too bad for the Government employees I know. They'll never hear the truth from the Market. When she smiles at you, you know it's legit. It's not like that fake tight-lipped face the Government gives its people year after year. A public school teacher can walk across water and get the same love his lazy co-worker gets.

But the Market, she'll reward you. She is just, and when she frowns, at least you can be sure it's real. I hope I can please her in my next job.

Ode to a Homeless Black Man Riding a Black Bicycle While Wearing a Black Helmet With a Jack in the Box Clown Head on Top

(by the_dude)

In a rush, you race, reckless
and sure
You do not have time for those who
meander or mingle
Speed!

Confidence you have.
Purpose is yours.
Vigor
Questions I have.
Why Jack in the Box?
Your destination?
Mystery

Ride on Black Knight!
Acquit yourself with honor and victory
shall be yours.
Who can stand for long against the clown?
Ciabatta sandwiches - for reals.